Sorry maa!

Hello maa! How are you? I know we’ve been far away for too long now. I am here in a foreign land gaining new experiences every day and I just cannot help but remember all those little things you did for me, which now, when I have to do it on my own seem too great a deal. Today a really strange thing happened. I was having dinner. Had made sambhar theoretically, but it looked like a mix of vomit and loose motions. I opened the new loaf of sliced bread I had got from walmart and picked up that first weird looking slice of bread. Remember my antipathy towards that slice maa? I always used to yell at you if you ever, even by mistake, made me a sandwich out of it. Oh! I so yearn for those sandwiches today. Today, I don’t even have an audience to crib about that bread maa. I simply took it in the plate and ate it. There was no one to whine to how yuck that stuff was. I am sorry for all those times I yelled at you for cooking something I disliked.

 I realized the number of utensils I have to wash after every meal maa. In those days I used to take every new thing from the fridge in a different plate. I did not know the efforts behind cleaning something as simple as a plate. Now, I warm the rice and the curry in the same plate maa. I realize how cognizant you were while preparing breakfast for me as well as keeping something as trivial as my towel ready before my bath. Now, I cannot just sit at the table after having my bath. I need to constantly stare at the milk boiling in the vessel to prevent a disaster. Remember one time I had told you “it’s math you won’t get it”? I am so sorry for that maa. Today while cooking I don’t get any proportion right. It was child’s play for you. I have to even pause the timer of the microwave at intervals to see if the food is warm enough. You would so easily select the right time and just go out of the kitchen. All those memories are coming back to me maa. I miss you maa and all I can try and do now is to make you proud. I cannot undo those things with which I troubled you every time maa but I hope when you see your son the next time we meet you are nothing but proud.

Love you, always!